It's the Olympics,
by Roberto Friedman
While the rest of the world watched the spectacular opening ceremony for the London Olympic Games, Out There was watching a screener of the new Absolutely Fabulous episode that takes place during the London Olympic Games. Fans of the classic British sitcom greeted the U.S. premiere of the third new 20th anniversary Ab Fab special on Logo this week with laurels and hosannas. If OT could afford Bollinger champagne on our B.A.R. salary, we'd have popped it and poured ourselves a Bolly-Stoli.
Eddy (Jennifer Saunders, also the series' creator) has rented out her house to Hollywood royalty Michael Douglas during the Olympics, but she and best chum Patsy (Joanna Lumley) plan to stick around and glom onto MD's pile of A-list invitations. Daughter Saffron (Julia Sawalha), just back from her new life as part of a polygamous marriage in Africa, and Mother (June Whitfield) complete the domestic picture, with Eddy's assistant Bubble (Jane Horrocks ) just about stealing the show in a series of Olympic athlete outfits. Truly, Bubble does a wicked Nadia Comaneci .
Instead of Douglas arriving, however, Eddy's guests turn out to be her diminutive ex-husband Marshall (Chris Ryan ) and his American girlfriend Bo (Mo Gaffney), who have been given his London stay as a gift. Bo claims Marshall has "caught" sex addiction from MD. Even playing an annoying, shrewish character, Gaffney stays her inimitable buoyant self.
Eddy and Patsy are grappling with their status as seniors (has it really been 20 years since E. made off with the "P.R. P.R. award?"), and they're determined to remain party girls to the last. Eddy lends Patsy her "control body" hose, which is a mistake as they wind up "crushing whatever organs she has left." Feeling for Patsy's pulse, Saffy remarks with horror that she doesn't have one. Eddy: "She's never had a pulse, sweetie darling!"
Eddy manages to insult and alienate celebrity designer Stella McCartney and 2004 gold medal winner Kelly Holmes in cameo appearances. But despite their contempt for the Olympics – "bloody sport!" – the Ab Fab gals end up with a private preview of the Olympic Stadium, where they indulge in a fantasy sequence about winning the gold. Ceremoniously, Edina lights the Olympic torch – from which Patsy promptly lights her cigarette. Just like old times.
In a lead-up to the special, Logo ran a marathon of the Top 10 most popular Absolutely Fabulous episodes, as voted on by viewers. We don't know which ones reaped the honors, but we hope they included OT's favorite Ab Fab ep, "Morocco." This is the one where Pats and Eddy take a trip to the Casbah, where they carouse, smoke hash ("It's legal here, so you can't disapprove," Eddy tells Saffy), ogle young men, and yes, sell Saffy off to white slave-traders. Rationale: "She said she wanted to see how the real people live!" Classic. We don't know how we'll get through another AbFab drought.
Anyway, preparing for the onslaught of Olympics media coverage, Out There watched a series of YouTube videos of famous fiascos that transpired during opening ceremonies. Perhaps the most can't-watch-it, can't-look-away of them all was the footage of the Seoul Olympic Games opening ceremony, which began with the launching of hundreds of white doves to symbolize peace, a worthy gesture. But not all of the doves flew away, and some chose to perch on the rim of the Olympic Torch – so that millions of viewers watched in horror as the Torch was lit and many unfortunate birds were flame-roasted alive. Tastes like chicken.
(Photo: Courtesy ACC Show)
The 2012 American Craft Council Show will take place at Fort Mason from Aug. 3-5, and two participating artists, Lou Ann Townsend and Mary Filapek, are a same-sex couple with a unique story. Both women are trained silversmiths who met while they were students at the University of New Mexico. Their work is collaborative, with both artists sharing equally in all aspects of design and production for their studio, Mary & Lou Ann. They fabricate the metal framework of each piece in sterling silver, or use a mixture of cast and fabricated sterling components. All cast components are created from masters that they have created in silver and copper, or carved from wax. Find more info at www.maryandlouann.com.
This year, the ACC is honoring San Francisco's Style Makers, well-known local personalities who are dedicated to handmade craft as both devotees and trendsetters. They include Zerodivide strategist Tim Wu and Velvet DaVinci gallery owner Mike Holmes, both longtime supporters of the craft industry. Holmes' partner Tom Hill is an internationally known metal artist and also an accomplished musician – he plays locally with a chamber music group. Also joining the ranks as "Style Makers" this year are CBS5 anchor Roberta Gonzales, San Francisco Chronicle columnist Leah Garchik , KRON-TV host Jan Wahl , Artful Home CEO Lisa Bayne , and community supporter Nancy Bechtle , among others. More info is at www.shows.craftcouncil.org/sf.
"Off-shore drilling is completely safe, you're getting sleepy!/Tax cuts for the rich create new jobs, you're getting sleepy!/Financial corporations will police themselves, and illegal aliens are stealing all your pens./Now when I count to three and snap my fingers, you'll awake refreshed and vote Republican.
"White people are the real victims of racism, sleepy!/Fox News is fair and balanced, sleepy!/Health care is a privilege, not a right,/We can work together to wipe out the middle class./Now when I count to three and snap my fingers, you'll awake confused and vote Republican." – Roy Zimmerman, You're Getting Sleepy (Metaphor Records), which also includes the stand-out tracks "I Want a Marriage Like They Had in the Bible," "The Unions Are To Blame" and "The Wedding of Church and State." Hit that reset button for all the brainwashed peeps out there!
"Exxon, I just friended you on Facebook. Citizens United say your voice should be heard./Exxon, you're a person, too. You got all the rights that people do./You spend millions on elections like a real person would./Citizens United put the mock in democracy." – "Citizens United." Zimmerman and his co-writer Melanie Harby make great political song parodies in the tradition of Allan Sherman and Tom Lehrer, the latter of "Poisoning Pigeons in the Park" fame. Tastes like chicken.