The original diva puppet herself, Madame is coming to San Francisco this weekend, bringing her nightclub show It's Madame with an E to the Rrazz Room in the Nikko Hotel, Oct. 29-31. It's her first appearance in SF in three years, and she brings her new co-star Rick Skye and a new show, which she describes as a multimedia romp through her long and storied life.

We chatted over the phone with Madame from her home in New York, full stop. Yes, Out There interviewed a wooden puppet over the phone, who said she was thrilled to be returning to SF. "No one loves the gay people like I do, the LGBT people. I love the whole gay Bacon, Lettuce and Tomato!"

Though she keeps the late Wayland Flowers in her heart, Madame promises she's not living in the past. She describes the new show as full of music, lights, and costume changes. "It's my comeback. It's hard making a comeback! Liza and I are exhausted. But I'm devoted to cheering up America, one man at a time!"

As it's quite the holiday weekend in SF, will Madame be dressing up for Halloween? "I've been called an old witch enough times. I'm coming out as a lady this time!

Madame's whirlwind tour begins in Vegas, from whence she'll arrive to grace our fair city. She assured OT that her hatbox and steamer trunk are fully packed and ready. "Yes, darling, I'm fully packed at all times!" Find ticket info at www.ticketweb.com.

After Marcus

Not that we think anyone could ever replace our late leather columnist Mister Marcus, but the B.A.R. is fully committed to continuing to explore the nooks and crannies of alternative sexualities in the Bay Area. To that end, so to speak, we are currently seeking guest columnists writing about their community, whether it be leather, latex, lesbian, bear, bisexual, transsexual, fetish or something we haven't even thought of yet! Send submissions, including a 600-800 word column, color photo in jpeg or tiff format, your name and mailing address, and contact information to: arts@ebar.com. If we run your column, you'll receive a $50 writer's fee – and the undying love of your community! No phone calls, please.

Beam us up

Recording artist Busdriver admits on his fantastic new album Jhelli Beam (Anti), "I used to think 'Norwegian Wood' was a Scandinavian adult bookstore." Well actually, he says more than that, a lot more, in a sort of Tourette's Syndrome cascade of inspired verbalization. He raps, "Sorry, underground hip-hop happened 10 years ago. Imagine having to say this at the pan-African theatre-group bake sale. It's been painted over like a glazed crayon pedicure. And its mantra's been scrambled into this crazed non sequitur."

In her interview with The Yes Men Save the World crusader Andy Bichlbaum, Bay Area scribe Erin Blackwell reports that that's not his real name. Out There would go even further and disclose that Bichlbaum is the pseudonym of Jacques Servin , once upon a time the computer programmer responsible for one of the great acts of gay-lib subversion in modern history. During the 1990s, you may recall, there were some cries of surprise from unwitting video-gamers. We did some "research" on the Internets.

"Completing a mission in Maxis' SimCopter was meant to end with fireworks and a big brass band, and most of the time, did. However, programmer Jacques Servin – insert your own 'big chopper' joke here – had his own plans, adding a bit of code that would occasionally replace the final level's such ceremony with men in swimming trunks kissing each other. Maxis fired Servin instantly, but it was too late: 80,000 copies had been sent out."

Because of our own taste for experimental fiction, OT knows Servin mostly as the author of two books of short stories, Mermaids for Attila (1991) and Aviary Slag (1996). He teaches as an assistant professor at Parsons the New School for Design in New York City.

Finally, a quick shout-out of congratulations to SF actor Louis Parnell, whose guest appearance as one of a pair of gay hubbies in the SF-lensed NBC series Trauma aired on Monday night. All that drama went down on TV, and the next day Louis was walking around town like nothing happened! A true pro.